I’ve spent most of this week feeling like I was walking in slow motion, or heavily medicated with mind-numbing drugs.
The death of a loved one (especially someone who was such a joyful soul) hits you in waves.
I’ve felt numb and helpless, and it took the poor service provided by a Nigerian retailer to wake me up and remind me to use my words (you can find my mini-rant on my Twitter page, @ivysoclassy).
I’m back to writing, scheduling posts, reading books for pleasure, and reading books about writing.
I have almost filled three journals with written magic 😄 Here’s to more writing (new posts from Monday) 😊 Rest In Peace, dear cousin ✌
Thanks for reading.
I recently stumbled upon a picture of myself from my days in the University in the early 2000s. What I saw was a beautiful young woman wearing black jeans and a top, posing awkwardly for one of the school’s numerous photographers. On the outside, I looked slim and beautiful. But I remember that I always felt self-conscious about my looks due to comments made about me being ‘too skinny’ and my general low self-esteem at the time.
I have decided to write 10 things which I wish I could go back and tell myself in the hope that a young woman (or man!) who gets to read this would find these thoughts useful:
- Love and accept your physical features just the way they are. If you think people have snarky things to say about you being ‘too skinny’ when you’re a size 8, wait until you become a size 12. The same people will act as if you have become an elephant in a fitted dress.
- Do not be discouraged by setbacks, such as not getting admission into the University which was your fist choice, or studying a course which was your second choice. All these experiences are preparing you for wonderful things in your future.
- It is not a bad thing to set standards for your relationships. Even if not maintaining your standards leads to a breakup, know that it is not the end of the world. Get up, learn your lessons, grow from the experience and try again.
- Try to set realistic career goals when choosing your course for University admission. Focus on what you are good at rather than on what seems cool.
- Stop trying so hard to sustain blood-sucking friendships. Having numerous friends is a good thing, but having a few good friends is even better.
- Take more interest in vocational skills, such as sewing and baking. Such skills will come in handy and they will make you a more valuable human being.
- Do not be too cautious-go to that party, have fun! There will come a time when you will look back and wish you had just gone for it.
- It is okay to be beautiful. There is no need to hide behind baggy clothes and a plain face. Dress nicely, put on some lip gloss, and take care of your skin.
- Do not be intimidated by the success of others or feel that your contemporaries are ahead of you in life. Your life is your own, and you will reach your life’s milestones at the right time.
- Do not let your past experiences (relating to family, friendships, relationships, school and work) shake your faith in God. In a world which is full of uncertainties, His love is the ultimate constant.
Thanks for reading!
©Ivie M. Eke 2017.
In the last year or two, I have undergone a makeup renaissance. It must have been after my usual struggle to define my unruly eyebrows. I went to the one place where I knew I could get answers to my makeup questions.
Since then, I have gone from being generally indifferent towards makeup and not knowing what a concealer was, to being quite apt at putting on makeup.
Makeup makes me so happy. I love the process. I love the makeup tutorials. I love the makeup swatch videos. I love the makeup decluttering and organization videos. I love the first impressions videos. I love the one brand tutorials. I love the half-face makeup dupe tutorials. I love the try on and review tutorials.
I love makeup related activities.
My makeup collection has grown from a handful of items to a respectable collection of brushes, eyeshadows, eyeshadow palettes, lipsticks, lip glosses, foundations, loose powders, eyebrow pomades, concealers, eyeshadow sticks, blushes, highlighters, and so on.
I can look at a brush now and tell you the best way to use it on the face, or which brush is better for packing on eyeshadow or which other one is better for blending eyeshadow. I can tell you that shimmery colours look better on my lids and matte colours look better in my crease. I can tell you that I have hooded eyes, so I have to learn how to maximize my small lid space for maximum impact.
Can you tell how much I love makeup?
There’s also another reason why I love makeup: I love the feeling of anticipation when I place a makeup order.
In a recent writing tutorial which I took, it was mentioned that continuously asking ‘Why?’ is a great way of getting deeper into the reasons for a character’s actions.
So, let me ask myself a series of ‘Whys’ regarding my love for makeup.
Why do I like buying makeup? It gives me joy and a sense of expectation.
Why do I look forward to this sense of expectation? I guess it’s because without it, my life would be routine and not very interesting.
Why do you see your life as routine and not very interesting? My major daily activities are going to work, and writing. Writing is generally a solitary activity for me.
Why do you focus on just these activities? I don’t have a lot of friends, so I focus on things which I can do to be happy on my own, such as writing or reading.
Why don’t I have a lot of friends? I have had very bad experiences in the past, so I tend to be very wary about whom I get close to.
Wow. That went from lighthearted to intense after a few questions.
Ultimately, so far as I am not running into debt, exhausting my savings or selling my soul for eyeshadow money, I think I am very comfortable with my increased level of interest in makeup!
My favourite Makeup Youtubers are:
Are you a fan of makeup? Please let me know in the comments below!
©Ivie M. Eke 2017.
For me, the more quiet my environment, the better! I share my thoughts about this in my latest newsletter which you can read here.
Don’t forget to leave your comments and share after reading!
I hope you have a great weekend.
Bringing with her tummy aches and migraines.
She might as well flog me repeatedly with a cane.
Her bag contains all the pimples a woman could possibly gain.
Why can’t she bring me fancy rings and golden chains?
Or bring someone to clean my house and scrub away stains?
I would have preferred a monthly plate of fried plantains.
Or better still, a massage from that ex-One Direction guy named Zayn.
But I endure her visits through gritted teeth and silent refrains.
When it is over, I feel my peace of mind and my sanity regained.
Written by ©Ivie M. Eke 2017.
My email newsletter, ‘Ivie’s Musings’ allows me to write about my random thoughts which are separate from my poems and short stories 😊
In this month’s letter, I talk about confidence and why you should (or shouldn’t) walk like a cockroach 😄 You can read it here.
Please subscribe, and happy reading!
2016 was a very significant year for me:
- I wrote on Classically Ivy throughout the year.
- I wrote for different blogs and websites.
- I read poetry for audiences on three different occasions.
- I read books about writing and took some online classes as well.
- I learned a lot about social media utilization, and
- I self-published an ebook, a collection of poetry.
It was also significant because I did not date/get into any relationship throughout the year.
It wasn’t a deliberate act. I certainly wasn’t walking around with a sign around my neck which read ‘Keep Off!’
It just happened that way.
And you know what? It was great.
Now, I am not against relationships. In fact, I will grudgingly admit that despite my experiences, watching movies such as ‘Love Actually’ manages to warm up the insides of my cold dead heart ❤️
What happened was that I was too focused on things like completing stories and poems, scheduling posts and other writing-related activities.
I was busy being a writer and blissfully happy being busy.
Without the distractions of wondering why ‘he’ didn’t call, or why I wasn’t making ‘him’ happy, I discovered that I have the capacity to be creative, and to be consistent with the creativity.
I have been judged to be a commitment-phobe, and assumptions have been made that I am single because I am too ‘picky’.
2016 taught me that I can commit to writing and blogging even when I don’t feel like it because the end result-the satisfaction of writing things which people enjoy-is worth the trouble.
So, I can commit to a relationship…but it has to be worth my while.
What lessons did you learn in 2016?
Thanks for reading!
©Ivie M. Eke 2016.
Who here has done a Pap Smear? (I need to stop rhyming for no reason).
I wrote an article about my (awkward) experience getting one done which I sent to thenakedconvos.com. They were kind enough to publish it on their website-you can read it here!
Please don’t forget to leave your comments and share after reading.