I recently stumbled upon a picture of myself from my days in the University in the early 2000s. What I saw was a beautiful young woman wearing black jeans and a top, posing awkwardly for one of the school’s numerous photographers. On the outside, I looked slim and beautiful. But I remember that I always felt self-conscious about my looks due to comments made about me being ‘too skinny’ and my general low self-esteem at the time.
I have decided to write 10 things which I wish I could go back and tell myself in the hope that a young woman (or man!) who gets to read this would find these thoughts useful:
- Love and accept your physical features just the way they are. If you think people have snarky things to say about you being ‘too skinny’ when you’re a size 8, wait until you become a size 12. The same people will act as if you have become an elephant in a fitted dress.
- Do not be discouraged by setbacks, such as not getting admission into the University which was your fist choice, or studying a course which was your second choice. All these experiences are preparing you for wonderful things in your future.
- It is not a bad thing to set standards for your relationships. Even if not maintaining your standards leads to a breakup, know that it is not the end of the world. Get up, learn your lessons, grow from the experience and try again.
- Try to set realistic career goals when choosing your course for University admission. Focus on what you are good at rather than on what seems cool.
- Stop trying so hard to sustain blood-sucking friendships. Having numerous friends is a good thing, but having a few good friends is even better.
- Take more interest in vocational skills, such as sewing and baking. Such skills will come in handy and they will make you a more valuable human being.
- Do not be too cautious-go to that party, have fun! There will come a time when you will look back and wish you had just gone for it.
- It is okay to be beautiful. There is no need to hide behind baggy clothes and a plain face. Dress nicely, put on some lip gloss, and take care of your skin.
- Do not be intimidated by the success of others or feel that your contemporaries are ahead of you in life. Your life is your own, and you will reach your life’s milestones at the right time.
- Do not let your past experiences (relating to family, friendships, relationships, school and work) shake your faith in God. In a world which is full of uncertainties, His love is the ultimate constant.
Thanks for reading!
©Ivie M. Eke 2017.